Christmas Eve Fishery

Glad to see you all again! I’ve been saving this one for Christmas Eve, and as the time has arrived, I hope to entertain you with this tale, so appropriate for the day. It should be considered a Tech Rule that the customer will always believe that waiting to act will save them money. This applies […]

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Der Boss, Part 2

Sometimes, Der Boss would throw you under the bus if it meant he could avoid having an argument with a customer.  No, correction, if he could avoid an argument with a customer by throwing you under the bus, he would do it every time. So, Prick-of-a-Customer buys a laptop. He buys it with only a […]

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Der Boss, Part 1

  I had a lot of good supervisors at Circuit City, and then I had Der Boss.  DB was your textbook example of someone who’d been promoted for all the wrong reasons.  Oh sure, he could kiss all the right asses, but when it came to managing his employees (i.e., us) he really had no […]

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Extended Range, Extended Stay

Believe it or not, this conversation is not unusual. “Thank you for calling CableISP, my name is Aaron, how can I help you?” “Yeah, I can’t connect to my wifi.” I pull up his account and check his settings.  He’s a cable modem customer in Chicago, and yes, he has one of our supported wireless […]

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Rules that Exist Because of Me

Be very, very careful when asking a person in a technical job to “spell out ALL acronyms” when writing up a company document. You’re guaranteed to get a document much larger than you wanted. How much larger depends on how much of a smartass the tech is. I am no longer allowed to tell people […]

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Tin Foil Hats and Wizard Caps

As most retailers do, Circuit City kept customer information on file.  While my former employer had some questionable practices, this honestly wasn’t one of them.  The overwhelming majority of times this information was accessed was to facilitate returns and rebates.  If the customer politely declined to give their information, we simply left it blank.  However, […]

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Mrs. Dull

When I worked at CableISP, Mrs. Dull wasn’t just a customer, or even a customer type, she was a full-fledged mania. She was one of those customers that was just so absolutely batshit crazy that nothing could explain her. Her case notes read like a Far Side Collection. A good number of agents had actually […]

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